How I tore my pants on the way to my new Job

Adding a touch of humor to your lives; read up on the following TRUE story of a most harrowing first day on a new job!

As with all new beginnings, a sharp image is always desired in order to make the proper first impression. As I was starting a new job (yesterday), it seemed imperative to get the image right.

The day started off normally enough, hopes of doing early morning exercise dashed upon the ground of reality and of finding comfort in the deep, warm trenches of the blanket in bed.

When it came time to “Suit up!” (as Barney likes to say) I was surprised that my first choice of suit was not a good fit. At first I believed I had mistakenly taken my father’s suit, but as it turns out, it was mine from a whole ago (and is now in need of  a slimming).

The second suit fit perfectly (a little too perfectly as you shall soon find out). After the wife took the glorious first day of new job pics, I headed on down to the car. Upon entering and placing my derriere on the leather seat, I was greeted with a strange noise which at first was attributed to sitting on a flyer from the many ads placed in newspapers etc. It seemed strangely peculiar as I do not currently subscribe to any printed newspapers, nor do I have any in my car! It was a welcomed distraction from the truth.

I had torn through the seat of my pants.

An obvious wardrobe malfunction had occurred which necessitated another change, lest the change be to my career for showing up in such a distasteful state.

As the saying goes, things can only go up from here! And indeed they did.

I had a tremendous first day at work, where I learned that the employees have access to a gym after office hours (which ends at 4)!

How I almost lost a toe on the Gulf Road of Kuwait

Darkness and sharp, unseen objects are a nasty, nasty mix.

What started off as a time tested relaxing run down the Gulf Road almost took a turn for the absolute worst when a freak accident happened that shed light (pun intended) on a very important issue: lighting and runners.

It started off normally; my wife’s prescription glasses were ready for pick-up. The shop is in Salmiya. We live in Hawally. I jumped at the opportunity to inject a run into my life and offered to pick it up on foot.

Distance to shop: 5K down the 4th Ring Road.

For the return however, I hoped to add a bit of scenery by running down the Gulf road, something I have done more times than I can count – at every imaginable hour. However, for the first time ever, as I approached the traffic light near the football pitch/ Maidan Hawally, I noticed that the street lights were switched off.

I continued running, not giving it much thought, listening to my music and trying to be faster (and failing).

It was then that I felt a sudden, sharp pain between my toes.

My right foot had unknowingly landed on a metal spike protruding from the curb; a left over from a light box for street advertising.

Fortunately, my foot placement had the gargantuan spike land in between my 3rd & 4th toes, grazing the top of the shoe but not damaging it.

The damage can be seen here:

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The spike perforated through the sole of the shoe, the insole and my sock (yes that is dried blood).

I was able to hobble back home, total distance: 12KM.

A cautionary tale for runners everywhere; watch where you step!

The Return of Rush Hour to Kuwait – Drivers be Happy!

Whether you are a parent, an employee or a student in university, chances are you will be up and at it early. Now, school is back in session, and what that means is the end of clear roads and blue skies (well, humid skies) for the 9~5 junkies who despite remaining in Kuwait over the Summer got to experience a form of vacation in that we could get to and from work faster without the presence of schools and their gridlocks.

Traffic

Rush hour is back with avengeance in Kuwait; during this highly irritating time it is extremely important to remember that allowing others to pass will NOT make you late for work. Be courteous, be kind, be polite, smile and allow others to merge in from side roads. In the end, it is something we all have to deal with, but doing so with a smile on your face will definitely help you get through the early morning commute faster and with a more positive attitude as opposed to cursing every being in existence that crosses your path.

Remember, do onto others as you would have them do onto you. And trust me; a**holes will always exist, every single day. The best way to beat em is to do something nice for a stranger, it will quickly relieve the fiery tension knotting in your stomach as a result of their a**holiness. Stay safe & jam out to your favorite tunes to relieve the stress too!

 

2 out of 5 Divorces in Kuwait caused by Kuwaiti Women

Statistics. Stories told in numbers. If a picture has the ability to paint a thousand words, then numbers have the ability to paint two thousand.

Look at the table below:

Kuwaiti Marriage Statistics

source (link)

The table quantifies the number of marriages between Kuwaiti’s, as well as Kuwaiti men and non-Kuwaiti women and Kuwaiti-women with non-Kuwaiti men.

The percentages are shocking; 1 in 5 marriages of a Kuwaiti man to a Kuwaiti woman ended in divorce. Also, 1 in 5 marriages of Kuwaiti women to non-Kuwaiti men ended in divorce (the percentage is a bit higher than 21%).

Meaning; if you construct a Venn diagram, the common factor in these two major divorce categories is … the woman.

Marriages of Kuwaiti men to non-Kuwaiti women however have the lowest divorce rate; less than 15%.

Now of course it is important to realize that past performance is no indication of future results.

It is a sad realization to look at marriage, what started off as an amazing union with such potential, as nothing more than a statistic in black and white. The bottom line is people are getting married for all the wrong reasons.

Be the difference.

@NBKpage has a sense of humor!

It is very gratifying this day in age to find a large corporate giant with a sense of humor, in this cutthroat era we live in.

During last Ramadan, the holiest of holy month’s in the muslim calendar, I was in the middle of performing a piece of advice learned from the greatest investment guru of our time, Warren Buffet, which goes, “do not spend then save, save then spend”. To do that, I transfer a portion of my monthly salary to a different account whose card I keep locked away.

Now, my main account is with NBK, and the money transfer page requires a reason to be inputted for the transfer. I have been doing this for a long time now, and got quite fed up with the whole process, so to spice it up, I inputted the following in the 3 lines given for reason for transfer:

Line 1: Drugs and Alcohol

Line 2: Do you even read this?

Line 3: seriously?

Happy with my joke, I went about my daily business without a care in the world after clicking send. A few days later, I receive a call from NBK inquiring about my recent transfer (the one for drugs and alcohol, during Ramadan!) The conversation went as follows:

NBK: sir did you transfer money to an account in Kuwait recently?

Me: yes, I did.

NBK: Can you tell me reason why you transferred the money for? Do you remember?

Me: err… not really no.

NBK: (proceeds to read the EXACT phrases entered).

Me: You actually read that? (Laughter on both ends)

NBK: please do not write this again sir or else the Central Bank will flag your account. we cancelled the same transfer.

Me: duly noted.

NBK: have a nice day sir.

So there you have it! they do read and it is important.

How GI Joe saved me from an accident in Kuwait

This morning I bore witness to an accident on the 4th ring road that sent tires squealing and bumpers colliding.

Had it not been for GI Joe, I would most probably have been the victim of the crash, as opposed to lucky #4 that stopped in the nick of time and avoided a rear-end collision with lucky #3 who also avoided a rear end collision, #2 however was not so lucky.

This story started a long time ago; Having wanted to watch what really happened to Serpentor and how Cobra Commander was reinstated, I finally decided to watch the aftermath of the GI Joe movie (the animated one that came out in 1987) – the dragon fire episodes. Fortunately I had the series on my hard-drive, and decided to spend 20 minutes finding out what happened (I had initially started watching these episodes on KTV2 after coming back home from school in 1994).

Knowing I would be late for work, I still drove carefully, speeding up only when there was plenty of space available to do so. It was before the Surra bridge that something not so out of the ordinary happened; I was cut off by a white Lexus speeding on my right and barely fitting itself between me and the car ahead. I took offence to this action and started blurting out expletives in the confines of my vehicle with no gesticulation (which I believe is still legal). It was then that things took a turn for the worst, as we ascended the bridge after Surra, I spotted 2 cars ahead of me a navy blue crown Victoria suddenly thrust to the right, then immediately thrust back to the left lane; the driver lost control of the vehicle and it ended up turning a full 90* and horizontally taking up the left and middle lanes, colliding with a Honda from the front right side of the fender. Having not heard the grisly sound of metal on metal, I assumed that the damage was minimal. The car before me swerved to the right, braking hard, and I did the opposite, taking the left side and coming to a halt, fortunately there were no speeders catching up to me which kept me safe from a rear-end collision.

What is interesting is that I immediately saw a police officer on the scene. I thought this was strange since I did not hear or see sirens. It was only after joining the moving crowd that I realized there was a car parked in front of the navy blue crown Victoria.

Care to hazard a guess what it was?

Come on, think harder.

Yes. It was the white lexus that cut me off.

Apparently they pulled the same stunt, speeding up on the right and overtaking to the left suddenly, without warning or indication. This move caused the driver of the navy blue crown Victoria to suddenly swerve right to avoid being collided into, at which point they found a slower moving vehicle, so to avoid a rear-end collision with them, they swerved back to the left side erratically, losing control of the vehicle and having it fishtail in the middle of the road.

Quis custodiet ipsos custodes?

All that is wrong with Kuwait in one picture

They say a picture paints a thousand words; how many words can you find in the following photo depicting all that is wrong with society in Kuwait? reply in comments:

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Mobiles are made to be Broken #Samsung #Nokia #HTC #LG #iPhone

Consumerism and materialism have taken a heavy toll on the retail industry. Whereas once upon a time products were built to last, nowadays they made to fall apart in order to encourage consumers to rebuy, renew and release more money into corporate fat pockets.

Case in point, this lightbulb has been lit for 110 years (http://www.centennialbulb.org/).

However, let us take an object that has become indispensable from our lives and pockets; our mobile phones. Everyone remembers the good ol’ Nokia 3310, hard enough to crack a sidewalk if accidentally dropped. Battery life 7-14 days.

Take a look at today’s phones. My Samsung Galaxy S3 has a problem with its USB port; crucial for recharging, which I do on a daily basis. It is in need of repair, and by that I mean it has to be changed. I had to rely on my old phones for alarms to wake up in the morning – a Nokia N97 and HTC Desire HD. And here is what I realized, both these phones I had for prolonged periods of time, and yet both are fully operational and never once complained of inability to charge nor required anything more than a format to fix any issues with them.

We are truly living in an age where our worth is measured by our ability to feed corporate Globia with our hard earned cash in order to kill the idea of identity and satisfy the insatiable appetite of consumerism.

Is it possible to break the chain?

The Importance of the Second – 99.7 RKFM experience

Good morning Kuwait!

If you are just tuning in, you missed the breakfast show with Tee, Acki & George Tarabay and their guests for the morning; Q8FootSoldiers & MyBloogle! (wrapped up in one suited, unruly haired individual known as me).

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Yes today we got an opportunity to cross off one item from the bucket list – and that is to be on live radio talking about two topics that are very close to heart – running and blogging.

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During the first hour we covered the topic of Q8FootSoldiers, the makeshift running group that sprung up in Kuwait initially as a motivation to get runners to post their stats in Kuwait when they run solo, but then It grew to encompass group running, recipe sharing and an overall healthy approach to an active lifestyle.

The second hour was dominated by blogging; the online version of reality television. How to grab and keep readers attention. We were asked what makes Mybloogle stick out as compared to other blogs that have higher viewership and followers, it all comes down to content. Your content is your key. Post a great article once, and you can follow with a video or a picture and a short caption about why you found it interesting, do that all the time however, and you become a run-of-the-mill plagiarist.

I love running. And blogging. And writing. As a matter of fact, most of the inspiration for my writing comes during my runs, so it is a sort of circle of life, Mufasa fights Scar, Simba rules the pride sort of thing.

The feeling of being behind a microphone live and having several people listen to you is astounding, a strict mental effort had to be in place to prevent the blurting out of “I love you Mom!” on the airwaves. Upon arrival we were given the quick 1-2 in terms of how to talk into the mic; green means talk, red means stop and yellow is held down for coughing (too bad there wasn’t a button to ask for water, my throat was dry and I was parched from yesterday’s 20K run I did to get in the zone for the first hour of today!), which I proved too slow to hit as some coughing fits came faster than others.

What is amazing about being on the radio is that you learn to appreciate the importance of time. At work we all spend the whole day wishing the hours would pass quicker, whereas with the radio, every. Second. Counts. There are timers and gizmos everywhere, on the wall, on the PC, in programs etc. that are perfectly synced in unison to each other.

Every second counts.

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I grew up listening to the breakfast show, to get the chance to be a guest on the show was an opportunity of a lifetime that was thoroughly enjoyed.

Thank you George!

The Curse of the #WorldCup Champion #Spain #Brasil #FIFA #2014

It is true what they say, the champions of the world are cursed.

In order for a curse to be proven as a trend, it must recur several times over the course of history.

The Cautionary tale of Champions

Let us go back to the year 1998; the world cup was held in France, and the final saw the returning champions (for the last time) taking on the host nation, Brazil lost that day.

Since that fateful world cup, a new curse, a Brazilian Samba Curse, was cast upon whomsoever would be crowned champion of the coveted world sport of Football, he who wins the cup shall face bitter defeat in the qualifying rounds of the next world cup.

One Cup to Rule them All

It would make sense that the curse be of Brazilian origin as they were denied the feat of winning the cup two tournaments in a row.

Let us look at the stats to support this trend:

France beat Brazil in 98. They failed to qualify and were taken out early during the tournament.

Brazil beat Germany in 2002. They failed to qualify past the 16 round in 2006.

Italy beat France in 2006. They failed to qualify past the 32 round in 2010.

And now, the worst of all affected, Spain. The Matadors. Dealt the worst defeat in World Cup History. Not only were they shellacked by their finals rivals The Netherlands at 5 – 1 to make up for the finals of 2010, they failed to win their second match, alienating them from advancing past the round of 32.

Tis true, fame is a fickle friend.

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