FIFA warns Qatar about Outsourced Team

If you can’t train ’em, buy ’em.

That is the moto by which Qatar lives and breathes; outsourcing its competitive requirements to stars from other countries.

A player is contracted to come play for Qatar; whether it be Football, Handball, Basketball etc.

Said player is then given a “sports-port” a sports-passport, becoming honorary Qatari citizens in order to represent Qatar on the international arena.

Firstly, Qatar offers to host the 2015 Men’s Handball World Championship.


Second, Qatar brings an All-Star Squad that managed to place in second, according to Wikipedia:

France won the final against Qatar 25–22 to win their fifth title,[3] a first in handball history while Qatar won their first ever medal. (link)

Here is the said dream-team:


A very Mediterranean looking team, wait till you read their names:

qatar team


A quick rundown of the Arabic names of the players (common sense really) :

Hassan Mabrouk (born 29 July 1982) is an Egyptian-Qatari handball player (Egypt)

Abdulla Al-Karbi (born 10 June 1990) is a UAE-born Qatari handball player (UAE)

Kamalaldin Mallash (born 1 January 1992) is a Syrian-born Qatari handball player (Syria)

Youssef Benali (born 28 May 1987) is a Tunisian-Qatari handball player (Tunis)

Hamad Madadi (born 7 July 1988) is an Iranian-born Qatari handball player (Iran)

Hadi Hamdoon (born 5 February 1992) is a Qatari handball player (Qatar)

Mahmoud Hassab Alla (born 22 November 1986) is an Egyptian-Qatari handball player (Egypt)

Ameen Zakkar (born 15 June 1994) is a Syrian-born Qatari handball player (Syria)

The others are from Montenegro, France, Cuba, Bosnia & Spain.

So out of a squad of 17 strong, only 1 boasts ACTUAL QATARI DESCENT. That’s less than 6%.

The last time this many different nationalities met was at the U.N.

Sepp Blatter, chief Poncho at FIFA, has warned against such shenanigans when Qatar hosts the World Cup in 2022 (link).

FIFA President Sepp Blatter has warned Qatar against putting together a team of imported players for the 2022 World Cup. Blatter described Qatar’s team in the recent Men’s Handball World Championship as an “absurdity”.

“The nation of 2.2 million faces the huge challenge of forming a competitive national football team by 2022. However, this cannot be achieved by quickly naturalising players because unlike the IHF, FIFA does not allow this,” said Blatter.

Unfortunately Mr. Blatter you are incorrect in your statement; Qatar does NOT have a population of 2.2Million, it was 2.1Million as of January 2014, of which 14% are Citizens, that is only 296,296 (seriously, the actual number is 2,116,400 total). Meaning slim pickings.

This is reminiscent of “The one with Joey’s Porsche”:



I’ll leave the how to your imagination.

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